Master Kwoth
commit
f8be61690d
32
NadekoBot/Modules/Searches/Commands/WowJokes.cs
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32
NadekoBot/Modules/Searches/Commands/WowJokes.cs
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@ -0,0 +1,32 @@
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using NadekoBot.Classes;
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using System;
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using System.Collections.Generic;
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using System.Linq;
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using Discord.Commands;
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using Newtonsoft.Json;
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namespace NadekoBot.Modules.Searches.Commands
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{
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class WowJokes : DiscordCommand
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{
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public WowJokes(DiscordModule module) : base(module)
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{
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}
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internal override void Init(CommandGroupBuilder cgb)
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{
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List<WowJokes> Jokes = new List<WowJokes>();
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cgb.CreateCommand(Module.Prefix + "wowjoke")
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.Description("Get one of Kwoth's penultimate WoW jokes.")
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.Do(async e =>
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{
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if (!Jokes.Any())
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{
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Jokes = JsonConvert.DeserializeObject<List<WowJokes>>("data/wowjokes.json");
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}
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await e.Channel.SendMessage(Jokes[new Random().Next(0, Jokes.Count)].ToString());
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});
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}
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}
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}
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@ -27,6 +27,7 @@ namespace NadekoBot.Modules.Searches
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commands.Add(new StreamNotifications(this));
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commands.Add(new ConverterCommand(this));
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commands.Add(new RedditCommand(this));
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commands.Add(new WowJokes(this));
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rng = new Random();
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}
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@ -133,6 +133,7 @@
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<Compile Include="Classes\IncidentsHandler.cs" />
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<Compile Include="_Models\JSONModels\AnimeResult.cs" />
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<Compile Include="_Models\JSONModels\Configuration.cs" />
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<Compile Include="Modules\Searches\Commands\WowJokes.cs" />
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<Compile Include="_Models\JSONModels\LocalizedStrings.cs" />
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<Compile Include="_Models\JSONModels\MagicItem.cs" />
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<Compile Include="_Models\JSONModels\MangaResult.cs" />
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@ -484,4 +485,4 @@
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<Target Name="AfterBuild">
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</Target>
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-->
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</Project>
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</Project>
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@ -99,6 +99,16 @@ namespace NadekoBot.Classes.JSONModels
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public bool Missing { get; set; } = false;
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public string FullUrl { get; set; }
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}
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public class WoWJoke
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{
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public string Question { get; set; }
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public string Answer { get; set; }
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public override string ToString()
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{
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return $"**{Question}**\n\n{Answer}!";
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}
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}
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}
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//{
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302
NadekoBot/bin/Debug/data/wowjokes.json
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302
NadekoBot/bin/Debug/data/wowjokes.json
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@ -0,0 +1,302 @@
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[
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{
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"Question": "What do you call a gnome priest",
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"Answer": "A compact disc"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why does the best raiding guild smell so bad?",
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"Answer": "because they never wipe"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why are boomkins neither overpowered or underpowered?",
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"Answer": "Because they're Balanced"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Who is George of the Jungle's other brother?",
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"Answer": "Mark of the Wild."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What do you call a masturbating Tauren?",
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"Answer": "Beef Stroganoff."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What's a rogue's favourite drink?",
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"Answer": "Subtle Tea"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Classic: What to noobs and Rogues have in common?",
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"Answer": "They both pick locks!"
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},
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{
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"Question": "What did Gul'dan do when he tripped?",
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"Answer": "He fel"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why didn't the warrior cross the road?",
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"Answer": "No Path Available."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What are the chances we have gotten the last content patch before a new expansion?",
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"Answer": "Slim Tanaan"
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},
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{
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"Question": "A trolls greeting is usually \"Eyy mon\" but what is a goblins?",
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"Answer": "\"\"Mon-eyy\"\n\n^^^^^I'm ^^^^^so ^^^^^sorry..."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What musician is from ICC?",
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"Answer": "What musician is from ICC?\n\nAn Arthas formally known as Prince."
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},
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{
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"Question": "How do you know if someone's been playing since Vanilla?",
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"Answer": "Don't worry, they'll tell you"
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},
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{
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"Question": "What happens when a demon forgets his sunscreen?",
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"Answer": "He ends up with a Burning Region"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why are raid guilds recruiting rogues for the illidan fight?",
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"Answer": "Because they are the only ones that have the required [preparation](http://www.wowhead.com/spell=14185/preparation) "
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},
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{
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"Question": "How does Naxxramas fly?",
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"Answer": "with it's four wings"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why is the Cenarion Circle neutral?",
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"Answer": "Circles have no sides."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why are rogues the best bar tenders?",
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"Answer": "Because they always have cheap shots "
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},
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{
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"Question": "What does Gul'dan like on his hotdogs?",
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"Answer": "EVERYTHIIING"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why did a Felhunter win the spelling competition?",
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"Answer": "Nobody else could Spell Lock."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What do you call it when Illidan teaches demon hunters in Legion?",
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"Answer": "a 'demon-stration\""
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why can't Paladins work out at Planet Fitness?",
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"Answer": "Because it's a Judgement-free zone. "
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why didn't the rogue like his dagger upgrade?",
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"Answer": "He wasn't a fan of knives."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What do you call a Gilnean church?",
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"Answer": "Worgenized religion"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why were night elves chosen to be Azeroth's first astronauts?",
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"Answer": "Because they know the moon well."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why are gnomes unable to be paladins?",
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"Answer": "Because they cannot reach the Light."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Did you hear about the resto druid who never plays guardian?",
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"Answer": "You could say he's all bark, no bite."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What's a dwarf rogue's favorite car?",
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"Answer": "Dodge Ram"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why can you only wear 1 shoe in the Emerald nightmare?",
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"Answer": "Because they'll steal Ursoc."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why is it impossible for a paladin and a rogue to make a baby?",
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"Answer": "Because paladins use protection and rogues do it from behind.\n\n\nTaken from Sodapoppin's stream on December 1st. "
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},
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{
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"Question": "Do you know how Illidan hurt his knee?",
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"Answer": "(this one came through in a GM ticket response today)\n\nDo you know how Illidan hurt his knee?\nIt's simple really...\nHe fel."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Icecrown Citadel was a pretty cool raid.",
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"Answer": "Even thinking about it gives me the chills."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why do Blood Elves tan so quickly?",
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"Answer": "They use the Sun Well."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What is Bolvar doing lately?",
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"Answer": "Just chillin."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What do you call 4 Mogu rolling down a hill?",
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"Answer": "The Rolling Stones."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What is Taran Zhu's favorite cooking utensil?",
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"Answer": "The Shado-Pan"
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},
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{
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"Question": "What do you call a vapid celebrity female night elf?",
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"Answer": "Kim Darnassian"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Warlords of Draenor was an emotional expansion.",
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"Answer": "Even the raids were in tiers."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why do hunters never get married?",
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"Answer": "Because they're always dis-engaging."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What do you call a kind warlock",
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"Answer": "Affection lock"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Which dragon has the dream job?",
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"Answer": "Ysera"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Healers are like artists",
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"Answer": "No one appreciates them until they are dead"
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},
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{
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"Question": "What did Illidan say when one of his group mates' gear was broken?",
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"Answer": "\"YOU ARE NOT REPAIRED!\""
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why do bars hate rogues?",
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"Answer": "Because they only want cheap shots."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What did the game tell the hunter when he dinged 40?",
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"Answer": "You've got mail."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What do you call a Blood Elf who eats his vegetables?",
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"Answer": "Kale'Thas"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Where do murlocs store their gold and treasure?",
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"Answer": "At the River Bank!"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why did the undead smell bad?",
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"Answer": "He had no nose."
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},
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{
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"Question": "How did the Rogue one-shot Illidan?",
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"Answer": "By using Preparation."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What's the first thing Illidan sees when he wakes up?",
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"Answer": "NOTHING"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why are all paladins so clean?",
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"Answer": "...Because they are always taking Bubble baths!"
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},
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{
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"Question": "did you hear about the monk serial killer",
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"Answer": "the murders were pre-meditated"
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},
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{
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"Question": "How much does a serving of Pandaren Cuisine weigh?",
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"Answer": "About wonton."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What injury did Gul'Dan get from playing Tennis.",
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"Answer": "Twisted Nethers."
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},
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{
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"Question": "A patch day joke...",
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"Answer": ""
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},
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{
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"Question": "Yo mamma so fat....",
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"Answer": "I tried to shadowstep her and I got a loading screen!"
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},
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{
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"Question": "What do you call it when the Argent Tournament catches on fire?",
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"Answer": "Burning Crusade."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why can you never take a good photo of a hunter?",
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"Answer": "They are always out of focus"
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},
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{
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"Question": "How do impoverished Warriors get their weapons?",
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"Answer": "They Rend-to-own."
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},
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{
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"Question": "What is Arthas' favorite camping snack?",
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"Answer": "Frostsmores"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why are warlocks faster after drinking vodka?",
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"Answer": "Because it gives them a Burning Rush!"
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},
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{
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"Question": "How did the druid catch a fish?",
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"Answer": "With his bear hands"
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},
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{
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"Question": "I really want the new Grove Warden moose mount...",
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"Answer": "...you could say, I consider it a moost-have."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Heard about the time Millhouse Manastorm went to Blackrock Foundry to visit Oregorger?",
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"Answer": "Me neither, but I've been assured there will be gnome ore puns."
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},
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{
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"Question": "So my new maid is a rogue...",
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"Answer": "... And she keeps on using [Vanish](http://www.brockaghltd.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/31900_4.1405683094.jpg) even when I told her I prefer [Resolve](http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/81a1jTSQzbL._SY355_.jpg). I'm so fed up with her!"
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},
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{
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"Question": "What do fire elementals eat for breakfast?",
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"Answer": "Ragnar-Os"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why do mages share cane's?",
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"Answer": "Because it's not his cane, it's R Cane!"
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why do sneaky rogues prefer leather armor?",
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"Answer": "because it's made of hide"
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},
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{
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"Question": "What's it called when an animal spirit crashes your UI?",
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"Answer": "A LOA error."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Man the 90s take so long",
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"Answer": ""
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},
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{
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"Question": "What is Shadow-Lord Iskar's problem?",
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"Answer": "Every time we get to him in Hellfire Citadel, he always seems to be in a Fowl mood."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why are hunters bad at photography?",
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"Answer": "They have no focus."
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},
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{
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"Question": "Why are paladins good at photography?",
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"Answer": "They use the Light"
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},
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{
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"Question": "How did the paladins get clean?",
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"Answer": "They had a bubble bath!"
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},
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{
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"Question": "You need to be careful of the trees in this game.",
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"Answer": "Some of them are shady."
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}
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]
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